One night this wench had senses that were confused by the drugs inside, but the fixation of the terminal’s dim lighting caught her eye as she called out to the people that she cared about. Luckily, those people despite barely even knowing her, and even those that knew her better than she knew herself, decided that it would be best to sacrifice their boring lives and entertain the little wench because despite how mother fucking badass one is.
In my own bright room I sipped the Bacardi as I chugged the worries in my mind. Slipping into a deep thought I thought about what I could write with a full nights rest despite the hard-on my brain had for giving me a writer’s block. I glanced around the tables looking for something to entertain the wench. Alas, nothing but books and uncompleted projects. I sat there scratching my beard (which needed washing) pulling out the clumps of things that might still be leftover.
I check the images again. Nothing but a series of repeating waving images and the fuzzy image of girl biting the blade. I stare down at the dirty keys trying to think of something to entertain the girl with. Nothing. Nothing at all. Maybe one of these days I’ll write something about some badass crime fighting wench with a butcher’s knife and a killer sense of using computers.
Tag! You're it! The rules are to state 10 random facts about yourself. Then, go to ten blogs and tell them that they are it.
!. I am uncircumsized.
@. Despite my bellowing tone I can fully recite (in octave) the lyrics to Party in the USA by Miley Cyrus while dancing.
#. I never believe I can do anything right because I actually take the words GO BIG OR GO HOME pretty heartily. For example, not a good artist but IM GOING TO TRY REALISTIC ART. fail, give up forever.
$. Not only do I know a lot of music, but I know a lot about music and music theory.
%. I’m terrible with horror movies. I watch Paranormal Activety and couldn’t sleep for a couple of days.
^. I don’t watch movies. I only just saw the Lion King two years ago… when I was 22.
&. I am always the educator for people being introduced to new subcultures. I make it easy for them to understand what the culture is about without any biased opinion or ideas from what the public perceives it as. Despite this, people still hate on furries and think BDSM is creepy.
*. Despite my poor anger management I don’t like it when people are yelling. I was always yelled at when I was younger so I occaisonally relapse even when people are just speaking loudly.
(. I wince like kids gloat when they are children or certain men when they’re taking a really rough shit. It’s not because of gas, pain, anger. It’s due to stress. I did it when I was child because when I do it closes off my eardrums without me covering my ears. Loud noises often meant stress for me so I developed it into my older years.
). I have suffered from 5 Grand Mal seizures and often joke about all of them. They all have hilarious stories because its better to laugh about something than to dwell on it. I often refer to Grand Mal seizures as Magikarp uses Splash.
the guy on the left in the tuxedo is the Man Who Will Stand On Top of Everything-- Tsurugi aka Kamen Rider SaSword. the other two are the Hopper Hell Brothers, the one in the middle is Yugurama aka Kamen Rider Kick Hopper, and the one on the right is Kageyama aka Kamen Rider Punch Hopper (both of them are also former Kamen Rider TheBee). the show is called kamen rider kabuto
Thank you for the extremely successful answer anon. Appreciated.
Today I was awakened to do a paid test for 18-25 males for Alexian Hospital. The test was to determine through two different brain scans (CT and MRI (and a special dose of MEG scan for me)) how experiences and things done will change people through the years whether it be the brain itself changing, your chemical makeup, or neurofeedback. I learned a lot of really cool things about my brain and my body and a lot of horrifying things as well.
The Good. -My synapses are responses are in decent condition for my age of 24. -Despite 5 Grand Mal seizures and countless concussions the cranium is in superb form thanks to a little help from Wolff’s Law. -I will always keep my ability to remember people’s faces through their lives regardless of changes in bone structure.
-Due to a specific anti-seizure medication my IQ has dropped by 32 points including my ability to recall even the most simplistic of things or childhood memories.
-I have broken more bones than the average 40 year old man.
-My life expectancy is a mere 70-75.
Today was pretty eye opening which a pinch of excitement and depression.
I’m in a writing mood so I feel like writing a reflection post that describes my complexity and why I’m soooo suicidal and stressed.
Recently, I’ve been breaking down to random music lately. Not even slow songs. Just songs that remind me of what I am and what could possibly happen. For example, a couple of months ago I was driving and “Pursuit of Happiness” remix by Kid Cudi/Steve Aoki came on a CD that I had made. Normally, it meant nothing. Just something update to rock out to in my car. But for SOME reason I just broke down. But of course the light turned green and I had to drive. Forcing back the wretching chest I simply cried… Letting the tears go. And within a couple of minutes it was gone. This had been a reoccurring incident for some time. The weird thing is… is that a year or two ago this would never have happened.
It’s mostly due to the fact that when I was a child it was never okay to cry. And that thought had been drilled into me for a long time. Life went drudgingly on and until about two years ago I had only ever bottled up my feelings and never really expressed them with anyone. All my relationships crumbled or revolved heavily around sex. I broke up with them like it was nothing and moved on simply because I didn’t have a REAL connection with them. I didn’t share my feelings or dig deep. It was always a surface relationship for me.
But lately, there’s this one girl who’s just gotten to me (for the sake of not exposing that person (can’t think of the word)). This girl is Charlee and she’s gotten to me because I’ve actually established a bone deep relationship with her even though we aren’t dating (I’m just not good at dating… period). And it feels weird for me to write this because I don’t ever talk about my feelings, but better now then misery later. The part that really hurts isn’t the fact that she will be going back to an old flame in a couple of months, but the part where I let down all the girls from before. Charlee is on vacation and I miss her and it’s hard for me to push her away, but I know that she will be better with the flame and that I can just support her from the sidelines.
I’ve realized that since I’ve met Charlee feelings have just been escaping from me and crying has been more of a just random occurrence, but that it does happen with some songs. Now the tricky part is that because I feel this way about Charlee dating her flame I know what it feels like to devote your feelings to a certain person and why the girls were so hurt when I broke up with them (some of them were legitimately crazy though). I can now understand why they hate or dislike me because they poured their feelings into a relationship in which I received them like a burst of air towards a brick wall.
The odd part for me is now that I now what it feels like to pour everything into a relationship I know that I want to seek out the forgiveness of the people that I hurt. But I truly know that forgiveness is hard for a lot of people and that I might be out of luck. I also know that I might never receive forgiveness from them which is hard because I still think about two of those girls. Que sera, sera.
I also want to say that before you call judgement upon me for being ridiculous and that “men are retarded.” I want you to consider the fact that life didn’t start for me until I could drive. I merely had acquaintances and no real friends or women in my life despite my bible thumping mother. So what most people learned, watched, or did in their younger years I’m doing now.
I just want to say sorry to Brittany and Stacy. I’ll do what it takes to have you forgive me.